Saturday, June 26, 2021

The Unwritten Rules of the Road


All this baseball talk this week has got me thinking. 

The idea of "unwritten rules" in anything fascinates me personally.

I'm a sucker for some ironic rules that form character. It's the little things that get me going.

I'm no baseball historian or analyst for that matter so I won't dive into any detail about the sport itself.

Instead, I'm just some asshole tryna kill some time on this rainy summer morning in Chicago.

So I'm gonna grab the topic of "unwritten rules" and apply it to a specific theme I'd like to tap into:

The Unwritten Rules of the Road

Growing up in Chicago, (not downtown) you pick up a few things that stick with you forever. 

As a kid who grew up across the street from a Chicago Park District, my eyes have always been on alert ever since I almost got smoked by that 96' Chevy Impala back in '02 playing cops & robbers with my older brother and his friends. 

Almost ended the game; almost took me out. Lesson learned. I always looked both ways moving forward.

(There's also that one time I almost got smoked walking past my alley back in grade 3. But that's another story for another blog (alleys))

Back to the topic, 

The older I get, the more I realize how unaware the pedestrians who flood our city's sidewalks are. These people don't give a flying fuck about the drivers on the road. 

Eyes on the phone. Pods in the ear.

And the kids are even worse. These shit heads are texting, biking & pegging all at the same time. Not a care in the world. Not a damn given. Makes me sick!

Back in my day, us punks owned the streets of our neighborhood. 

Lookin' back, the only reason we owned them was because we were the only assholes on bikes. 

It wasn't seen as an "exercise". Or a "good idea". 

It was seen as a vehicle to get you back & forth from football so ma & dad didn't have to pick you up. Simple as that. 

Nowadays these bikers own the fucking the road. They got bikes you can rent. They got their own fuckin' lanes. That got half the lanes hashed out for them specifically. 

Yet, somehow, someway, 

This city continues to create friggin' hoola hoops on the asphalt that ALWAYS compliments the BIKER & the PEDESTRIAN. 

(Don't be get me started on the Pace/CTA/Pulse bunch. Those neanderthals have no regard whatsoever for any common transportation vehicle. )

Forget the potholes. Forget the indented sewers. Let's just fuck up the whole street for these stinkin' bikers. 

(There was an old folk lore growing up that once you reached the age of 12, it was illegal to ride your bike on the sidewalk. Not sure if it was true or not but just had to throw that out there.)

I'm ranting. I apologize. This will be a blog series documenting the unwritten rules of the road. Specifically created for the people who live in Chicago but grew up in the suburbs. You won't find this kind of knowledge at the DMV. 

(These rules don't apply to the people who walk the streets of downtown. Those people are animals who cannot be reasoned with.)

1. If you are walking towards a red light that is about to turn green, and notice a vehicle signaling to turn right; take a look behind you. Check to see if there's anymore traffic approaching. If there is not, let the car go first.

It's so simple it hurts. If you are walking on any busy street in Chicago, you must be aware of your surroundings. Sure, it's your "right of way" but it takes two seconds to make eye contact and wave your hand. It's a kind gesture and you just made that person's trip a little quicker. A little concept known as "courtesy".